Trying a Different Approach

I am a slacker, my life is a cautionary tale, not something to aspire to or emulate.  Do not misconstrue that the I in me would wish to be any other than me.  Only that the emotional, and psychological traumas I needed to inflict upon myself to become as I am, are not anything I would wish upon anyone.  In searching answers to those ultimate questions I pulled an icarus. Not once, or even twice, nah I'm not that bright.  I had to push it till it cost me my top teeth, and partially my bottom ones, still getting over that one.  People have talked about genetic, cellular and other types of memory.  Now we are even to the point of beginning to grapple with ideas of moving without moving.  It's possible, without a doubt, it's not even that difficult when you've grasped for inkling of our true position in creation, and it fried you back into your place.  We can make black holes, we can warp space and time, we end up in the formless abyss, and no one but our dead mourns our passing.  I love people, I love the planet, all life can snuff out in our little corner of existence, and there might be some metaphorical tears shed on what ever plane of existence you and yours hail from.
Do we really have the right to take chances with the planet, solar system, galaxy, or on and on?
some folks seem to be interested in how I see things, some are offended, I'm ok with that too.  I know what I like, I feel what I need, I feel what the people around me need, using people loosely.
If we meet and you think you would like to chat, I'm happy to do so, if I offend, just tell me to please stop, and go away, and I will.  What I can not abide is total trickery, and dishonesty, I'm to good at it, and it hurts me to much to inflict those kinds injuries on myself.
I'll try to do a better job with some pix, and the like at showing kind of how I see this world, and why sometimes it makes me cry when others are so happy!  btw, if there is any confusion, I an hetrosexual male, that is so in love with women that they are my kryptonite.  it's pretty much the same with everyone, but we all get to pick where, and what we eat right?
Never been suicidal, not that I feel people do not have to right to decide the fate of what can be in this experience the only thing they can ever hope to claim ownership over, which is really just stewardship, we have horribly misunderstood, like so much of our K based systems, in such a rush to get somewhere.  They forgot that Wisdom, knows when, and where to apply knowledge, and thats why Wikipedia, has a capital W. No it's just that what is point of suicide in a zero sum universe. what comes in goes out, it's hotel california, we either come to grips, or we just keep blowing bubbles.

Much Love
Jack

there was a song from when I was teenage drunken drop out in the punker days

If some of your brightest kids are seemingly like the metaphors in this song, you might wanna take a look in the mirror before asking how things got this bad.  I was almost a perfect reflection of a child raised for the most part by the stuff around me, mostly tv, music, games, starting as early as I can remember.  I was never mommies monster at all, just a reflection of the monsters so many of us have become.
gonna try to finish up some e-mails, change get outside, and upload some pictures to instagram, in case anyone is curious what I'm about today.

Inner Demons, or Something Else?

      I'd like to thank Eminem and Rihanna for the inspiration for this post.  First off I've never been much of an Eminem, and my favorite Rihanna work is Shy Ronnie.  It's not a matter of not recognizing the talent, just hasn't been something that attracted my attention.  The video for the song Monster grabbed me. If you haven't seen it check it out.  On the surface it's good flow, and beat, and hook, and everyone in the video is
right on it.  Then I started to hear the words, and a few possible meanings based on my own twisted mind started to fill in where the actual lyrics of the song leave off. Lets face it everyone has their own definition for every word, multiple definitions for many, nuanced by usage, emotional flavor, timing in delivery.  Now I know these definitions are a product of my own devising, and I have no clue what is really intended by the artists, and it doesn't matter. The experience I have in watching, or listening is mine.  So what did I see? well if you didn't ask that question, I guess you might as well stop reading now.  If you still with I'll play in my silly mind for a bit, and maybe entertain you some.

I'm digging the whole imagery of being analyzed, though the lyrics don't really quite match up.  The video gives the impression of someone getting "help". The lyrics though are of someone who has come to terms with the monster lurking in their own psyche.  This zips me right along a thought train to the mystery traditions to know thyself.  I like this kind of connection so it draws my attention in a bit farther, allowing some less apparent or less likely depending on your perspective to form in this chaos of I.  I'm a fan of conspiracy theories, they are fun for me.  If the world we see on the surface is all there is, this is a pretty sorry place, so I kinda need that idea that just maybe things are not what they seem at all.  Making a link from this video to popular conspiracy was a piece of cake.  A simple Search of Illuminati and  the music industry is all it takes, now as I said those are fun for me, so that connection was made in my head pretty quickly.  It started when the idea that it's external to what Eminem views as self, the lyrics talk of the monster being not within, but under the bed, something external, and voices while in the head are heard. A labeling that leads to the idea of being distinct from.  Even the the line of being a messenger, and the shift in vocal quality are used to denote an external entity, something that is very different from what we see.  A possession of sorts, of something that is not to be controlled only befriended, and understood.
       As I said, I claim no inside knowledge, I'm not even saying I hold the view I just expressed, it was just a little show of whats rattling around in this thing I call a mind. So please don't go off thinking I'm saying this is satanic ritual, or expression, cuz frankly I don't know, and even if I did I'm not sure I'd be overly concerned. So once again thanks to Eminem, and Rihanna for some entertaining inspiration.

Jack
aka
PanseyBard